Thursday, May 16, 2013

Baby Weight: It's Not Just for Biological Mothers Anymore

I know. You're rolling your eyes at me. You know me personally and you know I'm teeny tiny and you're shaking your head because seriously? What could I possibly know about weight gain.

Laugh all you want. But my pants don't fit.

I've always assumed that since I was never pregnant, I escaped one of the more notoriously frustrating parts of motherhood. Baby weight. But here's the part they don't tell you. The weight isn't from the pregnancy.

I mean, it is. It probably is. And I don't mean to take the unique experience of pregnancy weight away from the breeders. Growing a person inside of you is, of course, a factor. But there are other factors I hadn't counted on. Age. Clocks. Kupcakes.


(OK spelling friends. I had to misspell cupcake. But I've been sitting here looking up words to make this work, and I couldn't find any. And Acc looks like an abbreviation for account. Which is not what we're going for here. Plus it's cute. Time to move on.)

I had always heard that metabolism slows with age. But I never thought it would happen to me. I've been able to eat whatever I wanted my entire life. Well, up until the past two years or so. Now, as I approach a "zero birthday" (it's not the next one, but it's the one after that...) I notice some pretty big changes. All of them at my waist.  I just have to face it. I'm getting older. Ack.

They just keep ticking, don't they? My responsibilities as a Mom are pretty overwhelming sometimes. And that's without the responsibilities of being a teacher and writer and musician and person. Sometimes I forget to eat. And then I'm starving. And then my choices are processed crap. (Although I did just find an amazing juice bar here in Greenwich. I thought I had found the answer. And if it's just me and I just need a smoothie it's perfect. But last Saturday I stopped to get a few snacks for Lily and I for the road. And it was $40. Seriously?)  I would love to make grocery shopping and meal planning a priority. Then I would always have healthy snacks on hand, and we would never have pizza for dinner. But I just don't have time. Ack.

(That K is still really bothering some of you. Now I think it's funny.) Lily has an extremely active social life. And you know what they serve at kids parties? Cupcakes. And candy. And cookies. And they look so good. So I'll just have one. Because I can eat whatever I want without gaining weight, right? Ack.

Now a few of my fitness friends are ready to have heart attacks (but they won't. Because they are so healthy.) over this. Find the time! Work out! Make meal planning a priority! Don't let your kid eat that processed crap anyway! These friends of mine, by the way, do not have children. But I hear you, healthy friends. Spring is the busy season in the music education business. And all three of our family birthdays fall within a month. Plus Mother's Day and Father's Day. When June is here, I pledge to make some healthy lifestyle choices. Maybe I'll blog about it. K? (As in kupcake.)

Yes, my metabolism is slowing down because I am getting older. Yes, my schedule is out of control and I need to make health a priority. And yes, I could say No Thank You to the cupcakes. But there is one other factor to consider here.

I might have been too small before I was a Mom.

Now you're really pissed at me. But honestly. My depression was at it's worst. And it's not like I was making healthy choices before. I very well may have been underweight.

So my pants are too small. Which makes me have a muffin top. This is unacceptable. And I need to make better food choices regardless. But you know what? I also might just need to buy bigger pants.

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